My question is about relationship. I am a 30 year old woman and I have been in a relationship with a muslim man for 6 years. We had a lot of hard time because we lived in two different country and we had a lot of challenge in our life, but finally we have been living in the same place for 1,5 years. We are really good together, we have the same morals and we support eachother and make eachother better every day. I do believe that we are mentally and emotionally matured people, also we are intelligent.
He is a muslim who believes and loves his religion. The problem is that although I am on paper christian, I even did the confirmation, but somehow I have never found my belief. I read the Bible, I have learnt about religion, I went to churches and to priests to learn about evangentical and about calvinistic part also. I do not deny the existence of God, but I also cannot fully believe in him. I am kind of at that point that I do not know if he exist, but I just live my life. I do believe that I live a good life. I do help people when I can and I give for charity regularly. I try not to harm anyone, make people happy and respect others.
I do try my best to support my boyfriend to keep his religion in this western country, I remind him to pray, I encourage him to participate on online friday-praying and he tells me about it every time. We read Quran together, I am learning a lot about and I ask all the time, and I do feel I am in it with an open mind.
The problem is that we read about that according to the Quran, he can not marry a non-believer. We are thinking about marriage, the families would be fine with it, although his family does not know that I do not believe. But he has constantly an inner war about this, as I am not a believer. We talked about kids, and I would be happy if our kids will learn about islam, read the Quran and pray with him. I am fine with not eating pig, I actually stopped eating it for a while, because I know that it is important for him. He says he knows we would be a good parent together and he does believe in me and that I would raise the children in a good moral and I believe him when he says so. But the religious doubt is always inside him and he doubts himself all the time. I can not pretend that I believe in something, when I actually do not, and I am always honest with him.
So my question would be about our possibility to get married and a religious man opinion about our situation as I do think that every case is different and I do believe that God wants the best for his people and that every religion is based on love and peace. So is it possible for us to get married or is it totally against his religion?
Thank you for you kind answer in advance.